Are we talking about going to a frozen yogurt shop? What do we mean when we say “swirly cosmic fusion”?
Join us on this podcast as we talk about how centering our sexuality in our relationship has brought us immense joy, peace, and satisfaction.
Learn three ways to infuse your sacred union with more bliss and juiciness today.
Hi, welcome back to our podcast RelationshipAlkemy. I’m Jordan Bessaignet.
And I’m Olivier Bessaignet.
And today we have a super juicy topic because, let’s be honest, noticed all of our topics are super juicy, but this one is called How to Get Swirly Cosmic Fusion in Your Everyday Life.
Wow. What does that mean?
Yeah. First of all, what does that even mean?
Yeah. So how can we create swirly cosmic fusion in our lives?
In your everyday life.
In your everyday life.
Yes. So, no, we’re not talking about going to a yogurt shop, although that sounds very delicious. Instead, we’re going to be talking about sacred sexuality, folks.
Right. It’s kind of funny. Sacred sexuality. In the mainstream idea, it’s kind of opposite terms, either sacred or sexuality. Sacred people. I’m sorry. Spirituality means being turning away from the body, from the desires and being monk in a cave. Sexuality can be spiritual and sacred.
Yeah. This is such an interesting topic to me because for me, I grew up super religious. Like, my parents were very Catholic and so to me it was preached. Sexuality is nothing but sacred in the sense of you only have sex if you want to create a baby. That’s how sacred it is. Which is a really interesting interpretation of the sacredness of not anything but sexuality, but the sacredness of union. And it’s really interesting from that mindset. It really pushed me into this space of not knowing about pleasure because it was like, oh my God. You’re only supposed to have sex if you want to make a baby, right? Yeah. Where does pleasure fall into sacred sexuality? Like from the mindset that my parents had given me. And then in my early twenty s, I dove into sex work and it showed me this whole other side of sexuality. And it’s so interesting because I think a lot of people would assume that because I sold sex, it took the sacredness out of sex. However, for me, because I was adding a dollar, a monetary amount to sex, I felt like it even made it more sacred in the sense of like, wow, people are paying me for this interaction.
And it kind of helped me realign sacred sexuality in my head, even though it was a stop on my journey to where I’m at now.
Yeah, I imagine like a reclaiming, a reimbursement.
Yes. I’m curious because we love the broadcast format, but the idea now is to do that in the Facebook group so that we can be also interactive. So I wonder where you guys at in terms of how you relate to pleasure and how you relate to the mainstream society kind of maybe impacting that negatively. I mean, your journey is particular. Yeah, it is very but yeah, like the transformation from this heavy repression to an openness that is not extreme either. You have to go through this kind of extreme pendulum to refine your empowerment, I suppose. I imagine I don’t want to put words in your mouth where now it’s, like, open and yeah, it’s flourishing.
Tell us more about that.
Yeah, I guess I’ve been reflecting on these things a lot lately because I’m actually in the process of writing a book, and one of the things I want to write about is the sex work that I did. And for me, sex work was extremely empowering. I got into sex work after being raped.
And so for me, it was just, like, huge reclamation of my power of, like, yes, I will now be a sex worker.
And I think what it really taught me, though, was that people are just looking for intimacy.
That’s what it really taught me. And some people can only access intimacy through, like, paying $1,000 to spend a night with a woman, you know, and it really made me tap into this my inner dakini, I guess, so to speak, and just I really learned how to hold people in intimacy, if that makes any sense, which relating it to where I’m at now. I think it was a really crucial skill for me to learn because I would call myself, like, an intimacy whore. I love intimacy. I love emotional intimacy. I love sensual intimacy. I call it the ooey gooey chocolate chip of life. And so I look at where I’m at in my journey with sexuality now, and I see all of these life skills that I developed. They’re very unseemingly.
Yeah. What’s the change of mindset between craving for intimacy? But it feels kind of out of reach through this kind of glass wall. Not necessarily get married, but being in the committed relationship and you have kids, and that is intimacy. But then it feels like a glass wall that we’re living together, we’re sharing so much, and at the same time, it’s hard to touch it. That was me at 30, and then I discovered tantra and dove into sodi plane to it that now it’s like it’s hard for me even to remember. I mean, I want to share my own too, but what are the shifts of beliefs that can open to this new paradigm?
So I would say that I hit a huge glass wall coming out of sex work. I had my first partner who I actually felt pleasure with for the first time ever, and I was like, oh, my God, what is this? Like, this pleasure? What is pleasure? And I started to really explore with him, and then sex work didn’t seem so aligned for me anymore, and I kept hitting the wall, and it was the inorgasmic experience. Right? And so I was hearing about all these women like, oh, my God, I’m having such good orgasms. And like, oh, my God, I’m kissing the heavens. I’m like, okay, well, when I have sex, it doesn’t feel like that. What does that mean? And after getting out of sexburg, also in my early 20s that I came across Tantra, which, for me, I had learned this mindset that sex was supposed to end in orgasm. Very orgasm focused. Right. The man ejaculates and the woman is supposed to orgasm only once.
And I was really searching for a mindset that would take me out of that paradigm of being so orgasmic focused. And then that’s when I came across Tantra. And the whole thing about Tantra that really got to me. It wasn’t about the orgasm. It was about enjoying the connection and enjoying the journey.
And that literally blew my world apart. And so the next partner that I had actually was trained in Tantra in the sense that he had gone to Tantra festivals, and it was my first Tantra partner. And our love making at that time, for me was like, oh, my God, this is a whole new level. Right. But then I was still hitting that glass ceiling of not experiencing an orgasm, which really made me crave penetration and crave more sexual experiences. One, I would say I’m a really sexual being to begin with. I really enjoy having sex once a day. For me, that doesn’t feel over strenuous and that partner and I have ended up going our separate ways. And one of the reason was we’re not compatible sexually. Like, he said he felt fine having sex once every two weeks.
I was like, oh, yeah. No, bro, I want to have sex, like, once a day. Yeah.
It’s interesting that you had this drive, although you didn’t have the satisfaction.
Yes. And I think that’s what made me have the drive even more, of course, the skill that I was already very sexual to begin with. And then on top of that, like, okay, I’m not getting this huge release. I’m not experiencing sets as other people as other people are sharing their experiences with me. I’m not, like, reaching this peak AHA moment. And then I came across you.
That was just a shamatic rabbit hole.
So if you guys don’t know, we actually met at a contact improv class. And contact improv is all about feeling the energy and just allowing the energy to be what it is and going on a journey. So it is a form of dance, and you’re dancing usually with another person, hence why it’s called contact. And then the improv is open to it’s not choreographed. It’s open to the journey. And so we met, and there was no talking.
Right. What’s your cat’s name? Are you a cat person or a dog person?
Yeah. It really allowed me to drop deep into the energy and to just like, wow, this is, like, really making me feel a spark. And I’m really curious to follow the thread.
What’s interesting is, for me, the perfect analogy is that the contact dance yes, we have a point of contact that we need to keep, but then in order to have a satisfying interaction, we need to feel into each other’s energy. Right. And so that’s really what separates for me, like, the first step that separates mainstream or where do we get our idea of sexuality nowadays? Like, porn takes a huge space in terms of education, sexual education, and of course, it doesn’t even exist. It’s only physical. It’s skin to skin. It’s like threading.
Oh, finding the thread.
No thread. I don’t have English. It’s on top of my tongue.
Spade in French.
That’s okay. So it’s really about the skin contact. Right. But in order to know each other, we have to tap into each other’s energy. So what does it mean for somebody who does not know what energy means? Like, hard to conceive. Right? So yeah, it’s something to experience. It’s connected to movement and to breath. Right. And so can I feel this person where they are going to move or how they express themselves? And if they have a movement, can I feel the vibration of that and understand and respond to that? So the communication is way more on an energetic level, and that’s one of the primary key for me. What makes this next level of sexuality re satisfying is that, like you said, it’s not goal oriented, so however it’s going to look like doesn’t matter, and letting go of expectations because then it opens this door of playfulness. Right. So it’s about playing with each other’s energy discovery and then yeah. One thing that’s really important for me is emotional intimacy. Right. So emotional intimacy is knowing how you feel and what’s going on for you. What are your processes, what you like, what you don’t like, and having this emotional intimacy plus the energy playfulness, that for me brings a level of connection that I mean yeah, just rubbing.
Yes, I got it, folks. Friction.
Yeah. Getting into this space, what are the best moments that we have access? For me, it’s like this doorway. This is the doorway to access that.
Yeah. So for me, I love that we’re talking about doorways because one of the things that we shared in our summary of what today’s topic was going to be about is practical tips to actually get to this space. Sure, this sounds all good in theory, and it’s very meta, like Tantra and all of this, but for me, one practical tip. So the first practical tip would be letting go of expectations, which I shared. Finding Tantra, like, really brought that home of letting go of the orgasm. And then two, I would say the timelessness. For me, that’s huge. And it’s really interesting. Now we have a child and our time that we used to spend having hours of making love is now like 20 minutes.
And I definitely find myself in this kind of go getter mode of checklist, like, okay, we have 20 minutes to have sex. I need to check this off my list. And it really dampens the mood. The intimacy. And it’s something that both of us can feel when we’re coming in with this mindset. And so my practical tip that I want to give is leaning into the timelessness of sexuality and taking the time to first of all, slow down. Yeah, right. I mean, porn really taught me everything happens fast. The cheesy example of the guy with the pizza box showing up at the woman’s house and then all of a sudden they’re like into penetrative sex. And you’re like, okay, where’s the foreplay? I even hate to call it foreplay because to me, all of it is sex, right? Yeah, all of it is sex. So getting rid of the mindset that only penetrative sex is sex was extremely helpful and then lavishing in the spaciousness to create this super juicy love making of like, okay, let’s slow down. And this is what I also do in contact improv as well. If I try to just start dancing with someone, it’s going to be super chaotic.
I’ve gotten elbowed in the face before. It’s just not going to work as smoothly. And so when I slow down, tap into myself first and foremost because how can I connect with someone else if I’m not even connected to myself? And take the time to enjoy the breath work of sex and enjoy the soft, the caress and the juiciness and to really feel it in every single one of my cells. And then from there, because if the.
Mind is focused on what’s next, then it can’t register really the sensation that it’s receiving.
Like letting go of that also opens the space to be way more present. And that’s like, presence is the biggest key to be represent to what is happening. Like that correct is like, okay, if I let go of everything else, I can really take it in.
Yeah. And so that would be my third practical tip of presence. And I feel like I hear this word all the time, like presence. Presence. And it’s like, okay, what does presence actually mean? So what does it mean for you?
Well, it means that my focus, my attention is limited. I cannot embrace the whole world simultaneously. So what is it clogged with? If it’s clogged with thoughts of how it should be or how it’s been before the last time and I have an agenda to make it the same this time, then my focus and attention is not fully available to what’s present. So presence is being able to give full attention to what’s happening in the presence. Okay, so as I’m receiving this touch, can I also feel the breeze from the door open and hear the birds? And so it imposed this timelessness because then I don’t have any bandwidth to think about the future, the present, the past. I’m all immersed in this moment and this moment becomes timeless and then it just grows. Right? So then I’m open to whatever is going to happen, and I can be surprised. And then it becomes playfulness. So the presence is, for me, read a gateway to, like, a heightened experience, because then I can put all my focus on receiving, being attentive to my sensations, and therefore, instead of being limited or filtered, then I can fully receive my sensations.
And if I really open to that, and it’s going to be up to a ten, and also my ten becomes a twelve, my twelve becomes a ten. Right? So my capacity for receiving and feeling and sensation, like, just expense, as we can expand our capacity for presence, then our capacity for feeling expense as well. It might start just like that. And this is all I can give presents to, and therefore, this is all I can feel. And by training this muscle, it’s muscle, we can expand it. And you’re just curious on how far I can go?
Yeah. So I feel like you just definitely described presence so amazingly, and I recently went to Burning Man and going there, it’s all about presence, right? First of all, there’s no service, right?
No positional. Presence is structured.
Yes. So it’s like this prime environment, right? And I think what probably gives about 90% of the magic is literally just being present because there’s no distractions. There’s no service.
Distraction to focus on something outside external of the container. So the container of the desert or the bedroom.
Exactly. And it was like, okay, no service, I went without you, which was huge. And it’s like, okay, I spent a lot of time missing you. And it’s like, okay, I’m in the most amazing playground in the world, and I really want to explore what’s out there. And by having no distractions and by allowing myself to just fully open up to this experience, which I find in the bedroom as well, like, okay, if I get rid of put my phone on airplane mode, our son is with a babysitter, it allows me to open up to this experience. And suddenly, this is like, what I love about sensual intimacy. And I’ve just, like, recently been sharing this term, and I get a lot of questions of, like, well, what is sensual intimacy? And for me, sensual intimacy is like, when we’re just both present and we’re present to our senses, right? It’s not necessarily about sexuality. It’s just about being open and present to our actual physical sensation. And so this, for me, is a huge gateway into sexual intimacy. And for me, I can experience sensual intimacy with just about anyone out there.
And for me, it doesn’t mean I’m necessarily going to go into sexual intimacy, but for me, it means, okay, one, how present can we be to this moment right now? Two, how can we let our senses open up to every single experience that the container, whether it’s Burning Man or our bedroom, is offering? Can I feel the silk sheets on my skin? Like just how deeply can I go into my senses? And so, you know, the five senses of sight, touch, smell, hearing. And I’m forgetting one right now. Smell. I don’t know if I said that, but anyways, just how deeply can I go into these senses? And then that’s when I start to feel like an animal, right? That’s when the primal being comes out.
So I love you that you bring in the animal, because usually the animal is considered as opposite to spiritual. And what I love is when I can feel both equally, which is like feeling the primal reality of this plane, which is the sweat, the skin, the roar, the groundedness, the desires, right. And even maybe some fear or some anxiety, like all that is happening. It’s very primal. And at the same time, I’m also wow, this is amazing. I’m in this cosmic space.
Yeah. And I think that’s so interesting because I would almost say that’s, like, an idea of colonialism, of, like, the animal is not spiritual. Right.
Versus, like, native cultures, indigenous cultures from around the world. A lot of Eastern spirituality says that, yes, everything is spiritual, everything is sacred. And it’s through the mundanity that we find the most spiritual, spiritual experience we can.
Yeah. Everything is an expression of spirits.
Whether it’s a tree or wolf or owl or us as human. Like, everything comes from intention. And so I love that it’s like I relate so much to that vision of the world. My perception, my presence is opening to receiving the intention of spirit. Right?
So it anchors I don’t know if anybody was expecting us talking about, okay, well, you light up the candles and you sit in yoga position, and then you breathe until and then we breathe together, which means we stay separate and we go into this spiritual space, but now it’s disconnected. Right. So that’s what we’re talking about. It’s about integrating everything and integrating this cosmic opening through our bodies and through our sensations and through our animal self. And so nothing is rejected because most of, like, a lot of religion or spiritual practices in the world tend to reject something. And so either they reject the physical body, which means to be spiritual, we need to get out of the spiritual body so that we can be in the spiritual space, which means not in this plane or sexuality is rejected as not spiritual. But that’s what I love about the town Trick vision, is that everything is spiritual and we can embrace everything, and we’re not rejecting any part of ourselves. So that is the direct path to wholeness. Wholeness is about not rejecting any part of ourselves. And if some of the parts are shadow parts, or where does shadow comes from?
From trauma, from negative beliefs. Where do they come from personal experience? Or are they implanted by the collective and the culture? So shedding all that for me, is really the path shedding is this negative belief about myself, about sexual. Am I rejecting a part of me? And is it implanted by somebody else, something else? Whether it’s a collective of my parents or a traumatic experience, can I bring it forward? Instead of rejecting it, can I bring it forward, look at it and see what the gift is? So it becomes also a gift and therefore part of me. And that’s bringing wholeness. Right. So it’s not like a turnkey switch. All right, here we are. We were not it’s a transformational journey. And it’s like step by step, little piece by piece, reclaiming every part of ourselves, physical and spiritual, together as a wholeness, as the one thing that I can put my presence and reperceive. All that at once. The muscle.
Yeah. And something about what you’re saying, this wholeness in our summary, we talked about Sacred Union. And so that really brought me to like, okay, what is Sacred Union? What does that mean? Now we’ve broken down what it means to be whole with yourself. Right. Fully present, slipping into that timelessness, the slowness of it all. And so now you’re going to connect with your partner.
So that’s my practical tip. It starts with Harmonizing. And I love that. When we want to be together and we just it’s not like, oh, yeah, I’m supposed to massage her here and then touch her there because it’s going to push some buttons to wake up. No, it’s just like melting into each other and fusing our energies to be curious to what’s going to emerge. And so the coming together of both our energy, The Union, how does it unfold start with that? With Harmonizing? There are many ways to do that.
Spooning or laying heart to heart, something that removes time so that we can go into time is less because energy has its own life. Okay. If we just lay on top of each other, then nothing is going to happen. On the contrary, if we can tap into stillness, then something is going to emerge. Like music comes from silence. Yeah. Now, what I love about listening to being Fly is like, they hit a chord or they hit a note, and it’s all about listening to how it carries. It’s like the silence or the vibration in between. That’s why the music is so slow. Because it hits and then it hits again. It’s all about the space in between, not about how fast you can hit notes.
Right. It’s a really good analogy. And for me, Sacred Union, I like to describe it. I’m going to take us out of the meta and down into the little bit of science to Sacred Union. In other words, for this, I would say co regulation. Right. So how can we allow us to be in a space where our nervous system link up with each other? Yeah. A direct plug avatar, you know, that surprise to each other. Truly.
I mean, I love the metaphor, but if it works so well in the movie, it’s because it tap into something.
That actually don’t even get me started on the chart. I love that movie. We watch it, but it’s true. coregulation is a fact. And we, as nervous systems, literally need co regulation. And nothing brought this home more than the birth of our child.
So when a human is born, their nervous system actually does not have the ability to regulate itself. This means that a newborn baby cannot control its own temperature. It has no idea how to do that.
Emotions. So if a baby, and even up to a child, feel something, like, they do not know how to get themselves back to a state of homeostasis, and coming at it from that perspective of like, okay, our nervous systems actually need time to link into each other. Really drives it home for me. It allows me to really understand. Sometimes I have a very linear mind in the sense of, like, I need the facts to understand these, like, very heavy concepts. And so just knowing, like, okay, if we take ten minutes out of our day to literally just lay with each other, no expectations of where it’s going, there’s no even playfulness involved. It’s literally just laying together. Yeah, it’s the gateway. Yes, exactly. It’s the gateway. And just allowing our nervous systems to sink up. This is when breath becomes involved. Even if you don’t try, you’ll most likely find yourself breathing on the same rhythm.
Yeah, breath yoga and all those teachings, they’re awesome, but they also teach how to breathe. But this is the opposite. It’s like the harmonizing opens up to like the breath happens by itself. Right. So it’s about putting presence to okay, I’m present with myself. I was being surprised with the rhythm, with the intensity, how much, like the range and oh, we’re not thinking, oh, now we’re sinking, et cetera.
I guess that’s like, my next practical tip is make this space to just spend five minutes together, just laying. We do this in the morning when we wake up. It’s so sweet. We have, like, our toddler slapping us in the face, telling us to get out of bed. We’re like, no, we’re going to co regulate so we can start our day off right. Yeah, definitely.
It’s a big game changer.
It allows our nervous systems to fuse. And I mean, I personally love your nervous system. It’s a very calm nervous system. I’ve never been to France yet, but I can tap into what it might possibly feel like to be in the south of France just by laying with your nervous system.
Well, I did not know what a black nervous system would be. And since tapping into yours, I’m like, how do I understand those RN and the songs when it comes from.
I heard the sound, but now I understand the vibration where it comes from and how it feels physically to produce that sound.
Surprise. We’re coming out with an R amp B album. So, yeah, that would be my other practical tip to reach Sake reunion. And for me, this is why I love the title of this podcast episode, which, by the way, I came up with. No surprise. How to get swirly cosmic fusion in your Everyday Life. And we were going to call it like, sacred Sexuality. And it’s like, no, we need something more than sacred.
How does we feel?
Yeah, how does sacred sexuality actually feel? Because I think this happens to be like a buzzword in our culture right now. And so like, swirly cosmic fusion, to me, that’s what union feels like. So it’s like this space and it’s so funny because I see it in darkness and this is like, I’m going to get like meta again, but I see it as like my energy, right? And my energy has colors and vibrancy and it moves and breathes. And then I see your energy and your energy has colors and it moves and it breathes and it’s just like living tangible thing. And then my energy begins to dance with your energy and it creates this beautiful explosion, swirly explosion of cosmic fusion.
And so I do see it in my mind’s eye as this colorful, like this weaving of tapestry, so to say. And I can feel that with us just standing here, I don’t need to be in a sexual space, although I love being in a sexual space and getting to connect like that. And so just by tuning into that a little bit more and like practicing these practical things to get me there, it becomes like fusion and this cosmic fusion of union. And so I can do this with you, right? I can do this with my son and I can do this with the plants and the trees and very spiritual, but I love doing it with you. As my husband, it’s my favorite, I would say probably my favorite activity on the planet. I love having sex, and I love having sex with you. I don’t know how many other people can relate, but I’m sure if you’re married, you could probably relate to the mundanity of life.
Of like, okay, we’re in this space now where we’re sharing resources, financial resources. We have a child that we’re taking care of, and we’re also trying to make a living as well as tend to other relationships, familial ties, while also trying to have experiences. And so sometimes I feel like at least in our relationship, sometimes the mundanity can just be not so spiritual and not so sexy when we’re talking about bills or when we’re changing our child’s diapers. And I’m like, oh, this is the least sexy place for me. And so by having this bird’s eye view, I guess, of squarely cosmic fusion, it allows for these mundane everyday tasks to. Somewhat become like, no, this is the spiritual path is through the mundanity.
Yeah. For me, it’s a gift. Every time I make dinner or I change the diapers, like, okay, I’m losing care. And then it comes back as connection because I get our sounds so genuinely static and happy to, like, when he sees me or when he’s playful or when I walk through the door and you’re, like, coming to me with a kiss. And it’s like this giving on the mundane is this huge feedback of connection. I wanted to also mention that one of the times that I felt the most, like, fireworks with you, with sex is actually going back to thrusting. I’m glad I got that word back, because that’s the image that when does the firework happens? Well, more like faster thrusting or stronger. Right. But for me, it’s been the opposite, where we find a point of connection and we just move slightly. Right? And just like, the moving slightly triggers all those electrical paths. That’s the way I see it. And we’re just this giant loop of electricity and energy of connection. When I find this place with you, this is where everything expands. Right. And then I feel like we can bring this back into everyday making breakfast.
So it’s kind of the opposite of what’s commonly accepted. You know, what’s commonly accepted in the mainstream society is that woman after menopause, they feel 50% less and they’re dry, and they’re on the damn role slope of their sexuality. My experience with women who have trained themselves or explore this path of sacred sexuality and tantra and lighting up their energy system, their electric system, is that the best sex happens after, like, also it opens up a whole universe and the whole freedom. It opens so much freedom. I know it’s not a general generalization about women in society, but the few women that have dated that had embraced this path. The best sex happens after the menopause, which is like, can you believe this?
I don’t believe you.
Yeah. Can you guys believe me? Yes. It’s my personal experience, but it didn’t happen when metaphor happened. Like, oh, now I need to do something right? Because then the only solution that’s left is pills. And that’s just the physical level, addressing the physicality and the symptoms will not open up this space. So the training needs to start ten years earlier so that when we hit that moment, it opens a door instead of, okay, what should I do? It becomes the new reality. And it’s the same for man, right? Yeah. I hope we gave some is it valuable for you? Even if you’re watching the replay, tell us in the comments, how do you relate and what did you learn? New? If you want to write in the comments, like, three words or, like, a brief takeaway that for you, hit something new that you didn’t think could be possible. That’s what I geek about.
Yeah. So for me, I love how do I get more of this coming from this super Catholic upbringing that was very rigid and then discovering, like, oh, I’m in orgasmic, and then discovering, like, oh, actually, my body has these capabilities, but because I’ve only trained my nervous system a certain way, I’ve been unable to access certain points. And so this is how I went from being inorgasmic to actually female ejaculation.
Right? inorgasmic to female ejaculation. Yeah.
By the way, folks, it’s possible, actually.
It’s possible for every woman.
Yeah, it’s possible for every woman. And this came from training in the sense of allowing more neural pathways to open up. The pathways are already there. Your nervous system has already done the work while you are being formed in your mother’s womb. Right.
Either dormant or activated.
Yes, exactly. And so the dormancy part of the journey for me has been removing the blockages that have caused certain dormancy.
That’s the delearning.
Yes. And so if I’m someone out there in the world who’s listening to this podcast, how can I get more of what we’re talking about? Like, what’s the next step? What do I do? Where do I go? Find me up.
Well, we’re going to try to give as much as we can for free, but of course, we have a mentoring program, and we have workshops, in person workshops to explore all that. But we’re not here to give you a pitch. Wherever you want to go with us or anybody else, please explore.
Yeah, it’s possible.
I love it. I want to be more present, less goal oriented, and enjoy the journey more during intimacy. Beautiful. Thank you. So your name does not appear for us right now, so I would like to say the name, but I can’t.
The Facebook user.
But beautiful takeaway. There you go.
Now you can see it if you’re watching the YouTube or if you’re re watching our live. Yeah, that’s the whole journey. Right?
Thank you for synthesizing that.
Yeah, thank you. Because for me, that’s the whole journey, whether it’s whether I’m in orgasmic or now I’m at this beautiful space of, like, female ejaculation, and I still want to know, how can I be more present, less goal oriented? I still fall into being goal oriented. You know, like, a checklist comes out like, oh, shit, we have a babysitter for an hour. Let’s hurry up and have penetrative sex so we can go pick up our child. I still fall into that. And to just enjoy the journey, to not put the pressure on myself or you or the pressure of just letting it all fall away and melt away and for allowing what’s actually there to come out.
Yeah. The pressure is the opposite of presence and opposite of this going to this gateway that opens up to this magical world of connection between the sacred and the physical. And, like, when we reach that place, it’s like, wow, yeah.
So we have another comment of thanks for sharing and for the knowledge. I like the breathing together and just allowing the vibrations to sink. Yeah, your nervous system will thank you.
Yes. Your nervous system is creative, magical. It’s wired to do that. All those superpowers, like, we’re actually wired to do that, but yeah, it’s just that the tension and the training or the lack of training yeah, trained or untrained, it’s really what it is. Yeah, because of like, the training is the mainstream society and parents and TV drama and school, they’re the best teachers for all that. It means, like, putting energy into researching information and exploring and practicing.
We’re lifelong students. Like, the second you think you know something, surprise, something else comes along.
All right, so thank you so much for your attention. Yeah. The three pillars that I really like to think about when it comes to intimacy and creating a committed relationship that is sustainable. We talked about sacred sexuality today. We touched on de learning and piercing our trauma and our shadow dissolving. It’s about wholeness. So it’s not about dismissing them. It’s not about or you’re bad. So this nagging part of me needs to go away because it wants so it’s about understanding it and dissolving and finding the gift and the message from the shadows and the trauma. So it’s about exploring that. Part number two. Part number three is the conscious communication.
And we’re going to have a separate podcast on each pillar because we just believe so strongly in them and to talk about them for ten minutes would not do it justice. So, yeah, I hope you guys really enjoyed our talk.
Yeah, conscious communication for me is the gate to emotional intimacy, because if we can both express ourselves so we give you the picture when it’s physical sexuality. But conscious communication is the same thing through words.
Emotional intimacy, folks, it exists. It’s a need for me.
I hope you guys enjoyed our talk on how to get swirly cosmic fusion in your everyday life. And I hope you guys go to a yogurt shop.
All right, we’ll why not? It’s on my screen now.
All right, be kind and be well, folks, and we’ll see you on our next podcast.